Here they are.
Courtesy of Trosp.
Paint
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Cingular
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Cough Syrup
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Fedex
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Energy
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Lego
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Correcting Fluid
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Mr. Clean
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Shoes
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Stop smoking
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Razor
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commercial,billboards ads
Don't smoke- Experiment from experts proves that smoking a cigarette after meal is comparable to smoking 10 cigarettes (chances of cancer is higher).
Don't eat fruits immediately - Immediately eating fruits after meals will cause stomach to be bloated with air. Therefore take fruit 1-2 hr after meal or 1hr before meal.
Don't drink tea - Because tea leaves contain a high content of acid. This substance will cause the Protein content in the food we consume to be hardened thus difficult to digest.
Don't loosen your belt - Loosening the belt after a meal will easily cause the intestine to be twisted & blocked.
Don't bathe - Bathing will cause the increase of blood flow to the hands, legs & body thus the amount of blood around the stomach will therefore decrease. This will weaken the digestive system in our stomach.
Don't walk about - People always say that after a meal walk a hundred steps and you will live till 99. In actual fact this is not true. Walking will cause the digestive system to be unable to absorb the nutrition from the food we intake.
Don't sleep immediately - The food we intake will not be able to digest properly. Thus will lead to gastric & infection in our intestine.
Some newly married friends were visiting us when
the topic of children came up. The bride said she
wanted three children, while the young husband said
two would be enough for him.
They discussed this discrepancy for a few minutes until
the husband thought he'd put an end to things by
saying boldly, "After our second child, I'll just have a
vasectomy."
Without a moment's hesitation, the bride retorted,
"Well, I hope you'll love the third one as if it's your own."
A kangaroo named Joey kept escaping from his enclosure at the zoo. Knowing
that he could hop really high, the zoo officials built a six-foot fence.
However, Skippy was out of his enclosure the next morning, roaming around
the zoo.
A nine-foot fence was put up. But again Joey got out.
When the fence was twenty feet high, a camel in the next enclosure asked
Joey the kangaroo, "How much higher do you think they'll build it?"
Joey replied, "They could build it half a mile high, but unless somebody
locks the gate at night, I am going to keep getting out of my enclosure."
A man was blissfully driving along the highway, when he saw the Easter Bunny
hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid hitting the
Bunny, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of his car and was hit.
The basket of eggs went flying all over the place.
The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled over to
the side of the road, and got out to see what had become of the Bunny
carrying the basket. Much to his dismay, the colorful Bunny was dead. The
driver felt guilty and began to cry.
A blonde driving down the same highway saw the man crying on the side of the
road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the man what was
wrong.
"I feel terrible," he explained, "I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny and
killed it. There may not be an Easter because of me. What should I do?"
The blonde told the man not to worry. She knew exactly what to do. She went
to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to the limp,
dead Bunny, and sprayed the entire contents of the can onto the little furry
animal.
Miraculously the Easter Bunny came to back life, jumped up, picked up the
spilled eggs and candy, waved its paw at the two humans and hopped on down
the road. 50 yards away the Easter Bunny stopped, turned around, waved and
hopped on down the road another 50 yards, turned, waved, hopped another 50
yards and waved again!
The man was astonished. He said to the woman, "What in heaven's name is in
your spray can? What was it that you sprayed on the Easter Bunny?" The
blonde turned the can around so that the man could read the label. It said:
"Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."
An Englishman went next door to welcome his new Indian neighbor.
He was shocked to see the man from India in his nice backyard chasing ten
chickens around like mad. "Must be an Indian custom," he thought to
himself.
Deciding he could put off the welcome till a later date, he went home.
The next day, he decided he was going to welcome the Indian man again.
When he looked through his window, he saw the Indian man urinate
into a cup and drink it." Must be an Indian custom," he thought to
himself. Deciding he could put off the welcome till tomorrow, he went on
with other stuff.
The third day, he was determined he had to welcome the Indian man. At
his gate, he saw the Indian man with his ear pressed against a cow's big
fat butt. He became angry and went up to the Indian man.
" I'm sorry sir, I want to wish you a welcome, but I cannot stand your
crazy Indian customs!" He yelled in the Indian man's face.
The Indian man looked confused and answered." Sorry sir, I think you are
mistaken. These are actually English customs.
I was told to be English you have to chase chicks, get piss-drunk, and
listen to bullshit."